I believe my partner is going through the menopause but she doesn't want to talk about it. She is showing all of the signs you have talked about and she is in a lot of pain at the moment from very irregular periods. It can make her not go to work for days. In my eyes, she smokes and drinks far too much. Could this be a factor? Please can you help?

Unfortunately, going through the menopause can be a very difficult time for some women and they may not even be aware that they have changed or have any problems, and talking to them may make things worse!

Painful periods are common in the menopause but can be caused by other factors unrelated to the menopause, and if they are causing her enough pain to debilitate her then it is really important that she gets this check out.

Why not enlist the help of a female friend or relative who can broach the subject gently and encourage her to see her doctor, even accompanying her if need be.

Eileen Durward